Me: “So tell me about your experience with getting photos taken for OkCupid.”
Nick: “In the beginning being on OkCupid was demoralizing. Like an example would be that I would send a message to a girl I didn’t find attractive just to see if I could get a response. And funny enough I wouldn’t get a response. So that would make me feel like, ‘oh I can’t get anybody.’ That’s how it made me feel.
“The biggest difference from the after photos is the experience with the response rate. So before in order to get a response from a girl I would have to write a very elaborate and very much for-the-girl message. It wasn’t an easy task; I had to spend a lot of time and effort.
But now I can say something like ‘hello’ or ‘hi.’ I can say it to really good-looking
girls and I’ll get a response. And it happened just the other day with an asian girl; I was like, she’s pretty cute. I think it was just ‘hi’ and she sent me all these questions. I didn’t respond. For me though I was still stuck with the mentality of ‘oh, I would never get a response back’ – and I did.
“I think on a few occasions I sent some really dumb messages to girls and I’ve gotten responses. So that would’ve for sure never happened before.
“So the biggest difference is feeling like that now I can pick and choose. Whereas before it was get what you can get. Which sucked because if there was someone that did respond and I didn’t actually want it, it’s a terrible position to be in.”
Me: “That’s so crazy to hear that.”
Nick: “It’s crazy to experience. To feel that.
“When you’re not wanted… I kind of feel like I have to prove myself. I’m constantly sending messages to girls trying to get a response. And now I don’t feel like I have to prove myself to anyone because the response is so likely to come back. It’s a huge difference.”